So I now have six pounds to lose this month cause I ate too many cookies over the last week and managed to gain a pound. Sigh.
On my Coffee blog I mentioned that I'd discovered a trigger. Now, let me explain something about the whole trigger thing. This is not something I'd ever really understood. That said I was reading a really good book and in it the author did an excellent job of describing a trigger. Both what the character goes through physically, emotionally, and mentally. The descriptions coupled with the words in this particular case, were a light bulb moment for me.
My trigger for many years has been the words, "I'm proud of you". Kind of a horrible trigger, huh?
That said, now that I'm aware of it, I plan to take back control of those words. I will not let them trigger me into depression, fear, and panic anymore.
My therapists called me a victim and talked about surviving. My mother called me a survivor and talked about moving on after trauma. I've decided I don't like either term. I'm a Conqueror! I was victimized, I survived, and now I will CONQUER my demons. I will face them head on and will win. I will not allow anything to control me ever again.
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